If you’re a.) anywhere near 30 b.) grew up anywhere near a mall c.) a lover of all things cheesy d.) all of the above, surely you remember Glamour Shots, the makeover photo experience that turns regular suburban girls into oversize Toddlers & Tiaras contestants?

But how, you ask, does one achieve the perfect blend of glitz and tack? Luckily, the folks over at BuzzFeed have you covered, with an ah-mazing roundup of “12 ways to achieve the very best Glamour Shot.” Step one: Hold onto your collar!

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Step two: Grab a funky hat…

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The list continues with silk gloves, feather boas, studded jackets, exposed shoulders, major hair, and a whole slew of poses that are meant to make you look your come-hither best. The photo gallery is more than worth a lunchtime click…we guarantee you’ll get a nostalgic kick out of ’em! So, time to ‘fess up, ladies: Did you ever get your Glamour Shots? What did you wear? Did you grab your collar or rock a funky hat? Share!

PLUS…more fashion disasters!

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Photos: via BuzzFeed